that Jesus was not God. "He's wrong," I told myself.
Jesus had to be God because God and humanity were disconnected by the sin
committed by Adam and Eve. God, I reasoned to myself, had sent His only
'begotten' son to die because He loved us so much. And because only God
forgives, Jesus had to be God. I even had the Bible quotes to prove it! Indeed,
being a devout Roman Catholic, I had read almost the entire Bible. In high
school, I was a lecturer, usher, Eucharistic minister, Sunday school teacher,
and the godfather for a nephew and a niece. The idea that Jesus was God made
sense. I am a Mexican-American who comes from a modest background. I spent my adolescent and teenage years in such small Texas Panhandle towns as Quitaque, Turkey, Lakeview, and Memphis. None of them has a mall, a movie theater, or a McDonald's. Memphis, TX, population 2,300, proudly proclaims itself "The Cotton Capital of the World." In Memphis, if you hear a fire truck or police car, either your neighbor's house is on fire or your neighbor is being arrested. Growing up in small communities gave me much appreciation for the simplicity in God's creation.
I graduated from Memphis High School (1994), enrolled in Texas Tech University in Lubbock, and graduated with a BA in management information systems from the University of Texas at Austin (2001). Not bad for a kid who hoed cotton most of his junior high and high school summers to buy clothes and school supplies! My dad was a cotton ginner. Now, he is a custodian at a high school in Pampa, TX. I had 8 siblings, but in 2000 my 17-year-old sister died in a car wreck.
I have always respected other religions. I often attended other Christian churches and joined interfaith Bible study groups. While in one such group, when I told my friend Chris that I was Catholic, he blatantly told me that it was "a false doctrine." As you can imagine, I defended my religion. Chris accused me of worshipping Mary, saints, and the Pope, and I argued that we only revere them. Around this time, I happened to see a man praying. His knees, hands, and forehead were touching the ground, and he was barefoot. After he finished, I introduced myself to him. He said his name was Armando, and that he was Muslim. I thought to myself: "OK, freaky, you're Muslim. You can't be Muslim. What's this Hispanic guy doing praying to Allah?" He later told me that Spain was Muslim for over 700 years and that thousands of Spanish words have Arabic roots. The ruins of mosques with Qur'anic inscriptions have been found in Cuba, Mexico, Texas, and Nevada. Most importantly, Armando told me about Islam. I began to realize that my reverence for Mary and saints was much more than mere reverence. Chris was right. However, we were both worshipping Jesus! Armando said that Jesus was only a prophet and that no one or thing is worthy of worship but Allah.
Many of my questions were answered! What is the purpose of life? How can the Father be the Son? Why can't God just forgive anyone He wants? What happens to babies who die before baptism? In Qur'an 5:83, Allah states: When they (who call themselves Christian) listen to what has been sent down to the Messenger, you see their eyes overflowing with tears because of the truth they have recognized. They say: 'Our Lord! We believe; so write us down among the witnesses.'"
Indeed, my eyes overflowed with tears as I read that verse. Yet I did not embrace Islam until 3 years after meeting Armando, because I did not want to change. A struggle occurs within everyone, everyday, and everywhere. We struggle to attain what is most important for us. By embracing Islam, we tell Allah that He is most important and that we are prepared to struggle to do what is right and to avoid what is wrong.